Prudes and Virgins Digest, v.1 #6 (NOT13) Mon Dec 5 15:12:04 PST 1988 WARNING: This digest may contain material not suitable for Reader's Digest. Do not read if you find this type of material offensive. Contributions: pvdigest@ernie.Berkeley.EDU Comments: nj@ernie.Berkeley.EDU Mailing List requests: pvdigest-request@ernie.Berkeley.EDU The Prudes and Virgins Digest is freely redistributable. -- nj ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Thu, 1 Dec 88 11:15:22 PST >From: Reginald Subject: Interesting positions I have discovered Contact: reg3 Good evening. Recently, whilst engaged in--well, let's be perfectly frank, this is an open forum after all--intercourse with my wife, i discovered an amazing new position, in which the female partner occupies what might be called the "dominant" or "top" position, rather than the more proper bottom position. We were curious as to whether anyone else has tried this revolutionary concept. We're rather afraid to admit it in public, since I think it falls outside of the bounds of general decency and propriety...but, as the common people say, life is too short not to "live it up" a little, eh what? Reginald ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Thu, 1 Dec 88 21:43:05 PST >From: Jonathan Subject: A question Contact: jonp I've been thinking about...er...well, you know, and...um...I was just wondering if...if...you know...has anyone ever had any experience doing... I mean does anyone know any good techniques for...oh never mind. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Fri, 2 Dec 88 10:02:33 PST >From: GERTRUDE Subject: KISSING Contact: gert5 DEAR PRUDES AND VIRGINS DIGEST. MY BOYFRIEND KEEPS TELLING ME IT IS OKAY TO KISS EACH OTHER ON THE LIPS AND NOT KEEP OUR LIPS PUCKERED SECURELY. IS THIS NORMAL? GERTRUDE ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Fri, 2 Dec 88 11:15:56 PST >From: Robert Subject: confessions... Contact: robertw ive never told anyone else about this before, but i thought you all might like to hear about it. it all started one night when i was studying for a physics test all alone in a classroom and this girl walked in and sat down and started studying. i couldn't help but notice her most prominent features. i had a hard time concentrating on my textbook. all i could think about was introducing myself to her. i imagined myself walking up to her--actually walking up to a real woman--and GREETING her. i reached down and started idly playing with my calculator as i fantasized. i thought of asking her out for frozen yogurt. i thought of "accidentally" brushing against her round, soft hands. i couldn't stand it. i had to do it. but then she got up and left. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Fri, 2 Dec 88 16:49:23 PST >From: Samuel Subject: What turns you on? Contact: samt Hey I dont know about all you guys but I get really aroused whenever a girl says "Have a nice day" to me. Is this weird? Should I go see a shrink? The short women in "Willow" really turn me on to. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Sat, 3 Dec 88 15:35:01 PST >From: Linda Subject: hi Contact: lindal um hi im new to this sex thing but the guy im with keeps telling me its ok im not supposed to enjoy it as much as he does,,,is that right? and what does he mean when he tells his friends "she don't care i've only got three inches"? thankyou ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Fri, 2 Dec 88 13:22:42 PST >From: Melville Subject: Hot digitized pix! Contact: mel2 Hey "dudes", I got lots of ]REVEALING<-- if you know what i mean *wink*. I've got Betty White in a low-cut gown, I've got Oprah Winfrey in a _miniskirt_ (and I do mean MINI!!!) and the best of them all is my pic of LINDA RONSTADT wearing a BIKINI!!!!! And if THAT don't turn you on you MUST be weird!!! Write me for more info!!!!!! (I want to TRADE too...I've been looking for a good Shirley Jones for "MILLENNIAS"!!!!) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Sat, 3 Dec 88 17:12:29 PST >From: Patrick Subject: "Bondage" Contact: rickb Hello-- Does anyone know anything about "bondage"? Is it like, "male bonding"? Thanks. Patrick ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Sat, 3 Dec 88 18:22:03 PST >From: Elizabeth Subject: Nightwear Contact: lizb Dear Prudes and Virgins Digest, This is ever so awkward, but i was wondering what your readers would consider to be...ummm....attractive... in the way of nightwear. Do the readers prefer cotton, flannel or rayon full lenghth nightgowns? Is there a tendency towards prints or solids? Fitted or roomy? This is truly a burning question on my mind, as just the other evening as my husband Percy and I were each reading various exerpts from Better Homes and Gardens Do-It Yourself Guide to Home Remodeling and Percy commented that perhaps to lend excitement to our marriage in much the same way our new storm windows add pizazz to our living room I should invest in some new nightwear. I hope your readers can assist me in my shopping endeavors. Elizabeth ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Sat, 3 Dec 88 20:49:13 PST >From: J. Jacob Subject: Re: "Oral Majority" Contact: jjc That's DISGUSTING! You are SICK SICK SICK!!! To think that they even LET people like you in...why, why I'll bet you even vote DEMOCRAT!!!! Brother Falwell should kick ALL of you commie bastards out!!!!!!! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: Sat, 3 Dec 88 23:13:52 PST >From: Hanna Subject: Wild fantasies Contact: hrb Dear P and V Digest Just the other day I engaged in the most unbelievable fantasy :^). I needed to study for my Chaucer exam and ducked into what I'd hoped to be an unused classroom. Well, this was the furthest from the truth. There was a young man in this room, but I was feeling a bit, shall we say devil-may-care, and i brought my books in and sat in a desk about two or three rows over from the young man. He was quite attactive, what with his neatly manicured hands and crisply shaved sideburns, and his shirt was neatly pressed as well. I very much wanted him to approach me, and to offer me a refreshment of some sort. We could discuss literature or this season's choice of music here with the University Symphony or perhaps the social happening next week at the Christian Center. My thoughts ranged even further into the future, about how, if we were married, we could have wild, frenzied family picnics. His shoes were neatly buffed, and he was reading what appeared to be some scientific manual or text, and he must have been an intelligent and well-mannered young man, and he would been an excellent conversationalist, and, well, just thinking of him *talking* to me got me so....ruffled.... i just had to go get a lemonade from the Cafeteria and I left quickly even before I could review my most recent notes. Hanna [[ last name withheld--nj ]] PS -- Please assign an alias and a mailbox to me; many people in my school read News and I wouldn't want them to get the wrong impression of me. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------ End of Prudes and Virgins Digest ************************ ------- -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.UUCP Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. Remember: Only ONE joke per submission. Extra jokes may be rejected.